What Happened To Me?

I finally figured out what's wrong with me. PSI. I'm not talking about pounds per square inch, but that needs working on too. Seems like it should be pounds per cubic inch or cubic foot. No, I'm talking about "Poor Self Image". Literally! Now I'm mad! All these years I've been looking in the mirror and thinking everything was cool. Seeing what I saw, you would too! I just realized that I've been looking at a false image, all this time! Did you know that what you see in a mirror is actually a reverse image of what you really look like? There's a bible verse about looking in the mirror, then walking away and forgetting what you looked like. I never had a chance! All this time, I thought I was cool, only to realize in the seventh inning, I've been parting my hair on the wrong side! Now I look like one of those idiots I use to laugh at for parting their hair on the left. I didn't know people were laughing at me. Sounds like a Bee Gees song,

"I Started A Joke"

I started a joke, which started the whole world crying,
but I didn't see that the joke was on me, oh no.

I started to cry, which started the whole world laughing,
oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
and I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.

Til I finally died, which started the whole world living,
oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

Copy the link below and listen if you like.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRNTQvXSsfA

I always liked the BeeGees. Their music was very sophisticated. It was usually very beautiful, but equally sad. I know most people remember them for their disco hits, but that was the BeeGees just "Staying Alive". Their "good stuff" was from the '60's. If you're interested, listen to the album "Odessa" or their greatest hits. Their name was short for "The Brothers Gibb". They were Barry and twins Robin and Maurice. Maurice sang and wrote, in reverse order,"I Started A Joke". He passed away a few years ago, supposedly of a heart attack, but I remember it was septic shock. Younger brother, Andy, also reportedly sang and died, in that order, of a heart attack, but at the time it was reported as drugs.

What?? Well I guess you're right. I haven't had any hair to part for 20 years or so. I went bald at 16. Whatever! You've heard of phantom pain or phantom reality? People who have lost a limb, have this sense in their brain that they can still control the limb. Not that they can control the limb wherever it went to. That would be weird! This guy has all of his limbs amputated, but he can still direct them to do his dirty deeds. Spooky!! I mean in their brain, they feel like the appendage is still there and they send signals to control it, but no one is home to answer. Of course you would have to actually have a brain for this to work. Anyway, I have phantom hair. I don't feel like a bald person. Ever wonder how a bald person feels? Pretty much like normal people. Sometimes I dream I have hair.It's pretty awesome! But,it's my thorn in the flesh, like I need something to remind me that I'm not perfect. Some say it's a solar panel for a sex machine. Well, I guess the batteries aren't hooked up.

It's only words, and words are all I have to take your heart away - Barry Gibb.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JECTUQVrvzE

Oh well, I'll be expecting a check from the Brothers Gibb any day now! Oh, I had another thought.! I try for at least one a day. If you ever get a chance, see the movie "Sergeant Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band". It's the songs from the Beatle album, plus many other Beatle tunes,used to tell a story which is acted out. Most of the songs are sung by the Bee Gees. There is also George Burns singing "Fixing A Hole" and Steve Martin singing "Maxwells Silver Hammer". But no Beatles.

Had to get a message to you, so there it is

I'm just a clown that used to run around .
I used to have a million friends.
I used to start where ev'rybody ends .
So I just give my best to my friends.